If any of you have read ‘Untamed’ by the amazing Glennon Doyle you will recognise this mantra from her book. She has also created a remarkably successful podcast of the same name which is now on it’s 50th episode at the time of writing this post.
We can do hard things has become a rally cry for a number of women around the globe. It is a life affirming statement. We can do hard things. We can deal with death, we can come out the other side of divorce, we can dig deep through illness and tragedy. We can face our fears and overcome them. We can do hard things.
Hard things aren’t just the big things that happen to us in life. Often they are the small things. Sticking our hand up in a meeting and asking a question we are uncomfortable asking. Having to have a difficult conversation with a delivery company because our parcel delivery has been delayed or gone AWOL. Having to find the perfect Christmas gift for our husband’s aunt (whom we don’t much like). Walking into a crowded restaurant or bar on our own when meeting friends. Seeing the doctor about the recurring pain we keep getting in our knee or worse…going to get our smear test done. Sometimes, just getting out of bed in the morning can be hard.
It’s dealing with, and successfully overcoming the everyday hard things that builds confidence. The simple act of facing something we don’t want to do, gritting our teeth and getting it done is an achievement and not to be underestimated. Yet we do underestimate it. We minimise the achievement in our minds. We tell ourselves that dealing with a delivery company or finding the perfect gift isn’t a hard thing to do so we should get over ourselves. We berate ourselves and imagine that everyone else is perfectly okay dealing with such straightforward tasks. That they don’t have the ‘hang ups’ that we do. Know this: just because someone else doesn’t view your ‘thing’ as hard, doesn’t mean it’s not hard for you.
Dealing with hard things is something to be celebrated and it a sign of growth and development. Dealing with hard things means we:
- Grow as a person.
Doing things we find difficult makes us grow. Whether it’s building our resilience, expanding our horizons or outlook, or simply listening to the angel on our shoulder gently encouraging rather than the devil who is whispering in our ear to admit defeat.
- Become a better person
Admitting that things can be hard gives us empathy. It makes us less critical and judgemental of others. We learn compassion, understanding and kindness.
- Build self-worth
The sheer act of recognising that things can be hard creates self-acceptance. Doing those things in spite of them feeling hard builds our self-worth.
So, for every time you do something hard, whatever that may be, take a moment to quietly give yourself credit. Give yourself a pat on the back and quietly praise yourself. Remind that each time you do something hard, you’re growing as a human being and no matter how small the task, it amounts to a big achievement for you.